Too Much Makeup, Too Much Hair

  1. Retouching last night’s make-up this morning and wondering whether that counts as getting ready or simply carrying on.

  2. Becoming my own facilities department. Hair appointment, dental appointment, mani-pedi, blood test.

  3. Started taking supplements. Magnesium, vitamin D, things for bone health, things for gut health. Not to mention all the hormone replacements I need to remain civil.

  4. Still buying clothes for a woman who goes somewhere other than the sofa. I admire my optimism.

  5. Why did I hate that photo at the time? Trying to remember this when someone takes one now. Apparently, I just need ten years to appreciate it.

  6. Love seeing the lady neighbours, but deciding what cocktails we want eleven weeks from Thursday is already yucking my yum.

  7. Dear friend leaving a voice note beginning with “quick question” and taking you through three generations of family history. FFS.

  8. Talking to another dear friend who thinks she has mummy issues because she’s still mourning Dolly Parton. What a legend. A sex symbol? Wholesome? Both? Was she allowed to be both?

  9. Perhaps that’s part of why we loved her. All those things in one woman, without feeling obliged to explain herself.

  10. Just voted. Please, please, please, please. We need to be spared.

Victoria Maitland

Victoria Maitland is a British-born writer living in the San Francisco Bay Area with her husband, John, and their very opinionated dachshund, Max. After a long career as a corporate executive and years (and years) spent observing larger-than-life personalities and the complicated, maddening, and often hilarious dynamics of family life, she finally put those observations to good use and wrote her debut novel, Plus One.

When she isn’t writing, Victoria can usually be found parked on the sofa, sipping wine on the rocks, sending her girlfriends an endless stream of random memes or sharing unsolicited but absolutely brilliant advice that goes completely unread by her two grown and equally lovely children, Zoe and Oliver.

https://www.plusonenovel.com/
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